I have written some additions at the page that I published on August 16, 2019, about Justin and Hailey Bieber.
Who knows if this Tweet was Justin Bieber's attempt to apologize to me or not? She's a good singer; maybe that's all he meant to say by posting it.
Almost nobody who has criminally victimized me and EVERYONE AROUND ME with hidden, illegal cameras and other privacy invasions for years has apologized. For the most part, the people who have participated in these abuses continue to be invested in victim-blaming and in minimization.
I won't say that apologies are nothing. They're not nothing, but the abuses are so bad, so pervasive, have hurt so many unsuspecting and innocent people, and, in my case, since eventually I'm going to be indentified to the public in connection with the years of illegal video of me, are going to have such an indelible and deleterious effect on the rest of my life, that there is no apology that's going to repair the damage.
No apology is going to erase the illegally obtained images of me from the memories, or probably the phones and other electronic storage, of my abusers. The thousands of jokes told at my expense can't be untold. The emotional distress that I have suffered, the mental health disruptions, the breakage of trust in a fundamental and universally understood morality, the years lost to me during which I could have done productive things toward building the career and social life that I want rather than struggling to maintain my will to live in the midst of being simultaneously vilified, lewdly propositioned, bullied for my imperfections, and laughed at for insisting that I have human rights, my dwindling fertility, the endless slut-shaming and subsequent traumatization of my sexual spontaneity and even interest in dating, the cruelty both casual and premeditated, the hypocrisy, the millions of dollars made and even careers established by and for people who participate in abusing me, the dehumanization of me which is now taken for granted even by people who spend time and money, who give publicity to humanitarian causes and who even testify before Congress and have access to elected officials, the attacks by corporations, living surrounded by advertising and other reminders of my abusers' enjoyment of my helpless degradation; no apology is going to fix those things.
There are mistakes that I have made in my life that I know I can't fix with an apology, that I know that nothing can fix. Even if the people whom I hurt with my mistakes were to forgive me, even if they were to say "We know how much abuse you've been subjected to and that your judgment was impaired," nothing will change what they have to live with for the rest of their lives, and that knowledge is what I have to live with for the rest of my life. That is what my abusers also have to do; they have to live with what they did, and with what they're doing.
Also, I'm not in love with Justin Bieber. If he thinks that he's in love with me, then he has to figure out what to do about it, because it's not reciprocated and it never will be.
