At the beginning of June 2019, I will begin my 7th year of homelessness since 2011. Not only have you and everyone like you remorselessly wrought additional homelessness upon me, while you all roll in money, you have continued to contribute to my being victimized worse than ever before, and you have inflicted that victimization on everyone around me for what will soon be two years. It is not forgivable. It is disgusting, and I don't know how any of you sleep at night.
It is also sickening, really sickening, that you named an entire clothing line only to spite me. It really doesn't register with you at all that research and writing take effort, does it? I spent at least two years reading and thinking and writing about the rape case which you are referencing with your clothing line. I did a lot of work to try to figure out what happened, and all you seem to care about is exploiting the months that I spent doing that work so that you can repudiate victims' stories and absolve yourself of guilt for how you have treated me and so many other people. Did you even read a full page of anything that I had to say about that case? Why didn't you just call the clothing line, "Girls Lie?" Isn't that what you want to believe? What are you trying to say, that there weren't cameras in my last two apartments, that voyeurism and involuntary pornography hadn't already happened to me for years before I had both of those apartments, that nobody has bullied me, that I'm not being illegally filmed every day now? Are you really calling me a liar? Is that what you're doing? Who the hell do you think you are? You really think that you have the right to make reality conform to what you want other people to think of you, don't you? That's not even to mention that I'm sure you have never thought about the trauma that you're causing for the victim in the rape case that I wrote about, what it's going to be like for her to have people all over the world wearing clothing with the name of the person who threw her to gang rapists on it.
All of that being said; before I realized what a terrible person you really are, how much you never cared about me and were only around me because other people were, and how all of you have treated me as if I am something to be shot at and then brought home in a plastic bag so you can stuff my head or some other part of me and affix it above your mantel, I spent enough time interacting with you to feel that it might be helpful to you if I asked you these questions, since nobody else seems to be asking them:
While you've been dating Hailey Baldwin/Bieber again, you've been on hiatus from working. You have mostly avoided reality, first by traveling around the world for months, and now by creating a lifestyle in which you are mostly only spending time with each other (when you're not thinking of ways to be horrible about me alone and together.) What about when you start working again, when you are around women again, when you're collaborating with other people, auditioning women for tours and music videos? Do you think your relationship can last through the pressures of "real" life (I use the term ironically. I cannot believe how much money you have, as evidenced by how much of it you are publicly known to spend every week, nor can I believe the extent to which you are perhaps deliberately unaware of how easy your life is because of how rich you are.)
I don't have time to ask another question. I have a 7:00 p.m. curfew at the homeless shelter.
______________________
There are half a million homeless people in the United States. The homelessness problem isn't only about lack of affordable housing; it is also about the dysfunctional systems which are supposed to help the homeless and in which incompetence and corruption are so pervasive that those systems help only a fraction of those whom they could help. However, to clarify the vicious, ignorant, lewd insouciance with which the conglomerate has treated me, the affordable housing crisis is relevant.
My last two apartments in Massachusetts were not, as the conglomerate has treated them, television screens where wealthy people and powerful organizations could amuse themselves by watching me for free. Although I have documented my years of homelessness before and between apartments, the conglomerate has discounted every painful day of those years. What seems to have happened is that, every time that I am able to obtain housing, the conglomerate acts as if apartments are given away to poor people all the time, which they're not, as if it's no trouble at all to get housing when you're poor, which it is, and as if there's really nothing wrong with criminally violating the life of a low-income housing tenant and laughing in her face while she begs that anyone who knows that she's telling the truth corroborate it so that she doesn't have to be homeless again from a retaliatory eviction brought about by the criminals working for the property management who put the hidden cameras in her home and who lied about it when confronted. THEY LIED ABOUT IT BECAUSE IT IS A CRIME FOR WHICH THEY COULD BE FIRED AND GO TO JAIL, AND FOR WHICH THE PROPERTY MANAGEMENTS COULD BE SUED!
The police did nothing to investigate the voyeurism in my last apartment, as I knew they wouldn't. What they did when they finally visited my apartment was exactly what I knew they would do, which was to walk around for a few minutes, say they didn't see any cameras, and then condescend to me for half an hour as if I were crazy. I already knew what they would do because, unlike you, I have spent my adult life since I was 18 being poor, stigmatized and female, and I knew that neither the police nor anyone else would believe me or really do anything to try to help me. My only consolation, and it's a poor one, is that somewhere out there in the years of illegal video that have been filmed in my various dwellings is footage of those police officers walking around the apartment saying "I don't see any cameras." At least it's funny, is a sad and horrible way.
You have no awareness of how privileged you really are. You seem to think that you run your life, when it seems probable to me that you have teams of people who make everything work for you. You don't pay a bill? Someone who has authorized access to your bank account pays it for you. You run up a credit card bill without thinking about your credit limit? Someone whom you pay and whom you might not even have ever met takes care of that for you, also. You commit crimes? You don't even have to be present in court for your hearings, and you can even be photographed making out with your fiancee in a park on the day when you're supposed to be in court, and you're not punished because your expensive lawyers take care of it all.
Not only do you have teams of people who make everything work for you, every system out there which punishes me for asking that my rights be respected falls in line to do what you want, even when you're wrong, and you have no awareness of that, either. You think that I'm not helped by anyone because I don't deserve it. My abject, obvious, agonizing, infuriating helplessness doesn't make you feel guilty; it makes you feel vindicated, and it even amuses you.
I don't mean to drag religion into this discussion yet again, but are you familiar with the story of Jesus, or with Christian principles? "Rich Guy With Multiple Mansions, Filming People Without So Much Money In The Bathroom?" Is that your idea of accurate captioning for a Nativity scene? Do you live your life with the impression that you're a martyr because people write unflattering comments to your Instagram? You do, don't you? You feel misunderstood.
All of the above, take or leave religion, describes the conglomerate; a gang of dishonest, predatory, hyperprivileged bullies. THEY are the parasites, egomaniacs and liars.
_____________________
I don't want to be receiving welfare, but for me it is preferable to having my bills paid as a result of personal relationships with individuals who will then have personal power over me. I have used welfare the way that it's supposed to be used; to pay my bills and have some spending money so that I am not totally dependent on individual donations from other people or from charities, while I try, year after futile year, to rebuild my life.
The conglomerate forces me to be poor and dependent; it attacks every productive thing that I try to do. The conglomerate wants me to conform to the image which it thinks excuses its abuse of me; an aging femme fatale who's trying to snare a rich man. The conglomerate is pathetic. Given what my options are, I can be proud of being poor, since the only alternative that I have had since 2010 is to be a prostitute for a stupid celebrity. What I won't give them voluntarily, they take criminally, and they are so deluded in their feelings of superiority to the rest of humanity that they have the gall to blame me for it.
______________________
There are half a million homeless people in the United States. The homelessness problem isn't only about lack of affordable housing; it is also about the dysfunctional systems which are supposed to help the homeless and in which incompetence and corruption are so pervasive that those systems help only a fraction of those whom they could help. However, to clarify the vicious, ignorant, lewd insouciance with which the conglomerate has treated me, the affordable housing crisis is relevant.
My last two apartments in Massachusetts were not, as the conglomerate has treated them, television screens where wealthy people and powerful organizations could amuse themselves by watching me for free. Although I have documented my years of homelessness before and between apartments, the conglomerate has discounted every painful day of those years. What seems to have happened is that, every time that I am able to obtain housing, the conglomerate acts as if apartments are given away to poor people all the time, which they're not, as if it's no trouble at all to get housing when you're poor, which it is, and as if there's really nothing wrong with criminally violating the life of a low-income housing tenant and laughing in her face while she begs that anyone who knows that she's telling the truth corroborate it so that she doesn't have to be homeless again from a retaliatory eviction brought about by the criminals working for the property management who put the hidden cameras in her home and who lied about it when confronted. THEY LIED ABOUT IT BECAUSE IT IS A CRIME FOR WHICH THEY COULD BE FIRED AND GO TO JAIL, AND FOR WHICH THE PROPERTY MANAGEMENTS COULD BE SUED!
The police did nothing to investigate the voyeurism in my last apartment, as I knew they wouldn't. What they did when they finally visited my apartment was exactly what I knew they would do, which was to walk around for a few minutes, say they didn't see any cameras, and then condescend to me for half an hour as if I were crazy. I already knew what they would do because, unlike you, I have spent my adult life since I was 18 being poor, stigmatized and female, and I knew that neither the police nor anyone else would believe me or really do anything to try to help me. My only consolation, and it's a poor one, is that somewhere out there in the years of illegal video that have been filmed in my various dwellings is footage of those police officers walking around the apartment saying "I don't see any cameras." At least it's funny, is a sad and horrible way.
You have no awareness of how privileged you really are. You seem to think that you run your life, when it seems probable to me that you have teams of people who make everything work for you. You don't pay a bill? Someone who has authorized access to your bank account pays it for you. You run up a credit card bill without thinking about your credit limit? Someone whom you pay and whom you might not even have ever met takes care of that for you, also. You commit crimes? You don't even have to be present in court for your hearings, and you can even be photographed making out with your fiancee in a park on the day when you're supposed to be in court, and you're not punished because your expensive lawyers take care of it all.
Not only do you have teams of people who make everything work for you, every system out there which punishes me for asking that my rights be respected falls in line to do what you want, even when you're wrong, and you have no awareness of that, either. You think that I'm not helped by anyone because I don't deserve it. My abject, obvious, agonizing, infuriating helplessness doesn't make you feel guilty; it makes you feel vindicated, and it even amuses you.
I don't mean to drag religion into this discussion yet again, but are you familiar with the story of Jesus, or with Christian principles? "Rich Guy With Multiple Mansions, Filming People Without So Much Money In The Bathroom?" Is that your idea of accurate captioning for a Nativity scene? Do you live your life with the impression that you're a martyr because people write unflattering comments to your Instagram? You do, don't you? You feel misunderstood.
All of the above, take or leave religion, describes the conglomerate; a gang of dishonest, predatory, hyperprivileged bullies. THEY are the parasites, egomaniacs and liars.
_____________________
I don't want to be receiving welfare, but for me it is preferable to having my bills paid as a result of personal relationships with individuals who will then have personal power over me. I have used welfare the way that it's supposed to be used; to pay my bills and have some spending money so that I am not totally dependent on individual donations from other people or from charities, while I try, year after futile year, to rebuild my life.
The conglomerate forces me to be poor and dependent; it attacks every productive thing that I try to do. The conglomerate wants me to conform to the image which it thinks excuses its abuse of me; an aging femme fatale who's trying to snare a rich man. The conglomerate is pathetic. Given what my options are, I can be proud of being poor, since the only alternative that I have had since 2010 is to be a prostitute for a stupid celebrity. What I won't give them voluntarily, they take criminally, and they are so deluded in their feelings of superiority to the rest of humanity that they have the gall to blame me for it.
